I was thinking that the feeling I’m having at the end of this year was somewhat unique. Then I decided to go back and look at my past couple New Year’s posts, and it looks like I have typically have this sense of optimism. I’ve even had the feeling of “that was a rough year, now I’m ready for a good year” like I have now. I do think there’s a little bit of a different spin this year – and of course I will get to that soon in many more words than are probably necessary – but it looks like this is my standard approach to the turning of the calendar.
I’m glad to see 2011 come to an end, but I’m also satisfied with the way the year played out. It doesn’t feel like I want to say “good riddance” to the year. Some of the events, maybe. But not the whole year.The move obviously was the defining event of the year, and it was very difficult in many ways. But I don’t regret it. It didn’t kill us, and I do think it made us stronger. In fact, even though the move was the defining event, I’ve thought more about our family and the ways that we have changed when I have reflected on the past year. Each of us changed throughout the year. Some of that was due to the move and some was due to the stages of life that we are all in. Those changes brought some growing pains, but overall I feel like we are moving in a positive direction. I think we grew closer together this year, even as the kids start to fight a little more with each other and with us. Without having many familiar things to hold on to, we found some comfort in each other. I think that will pay dividends in the years to come.
The satisfaction at the end partly comes from the bumps starting to settle down. There hasn’t been a major catastrophe with the house for a few months, and we’ve also had some time to evaluate how things are going and make some changes we feel are needed. The other part of the satisfaction is the sense of accomplishment that I have. My pre-vacation work list got done, but more than that I feel like we are doing what we set out to do. Donia and I are seeing eye to eye on things, and we are moving past the difficulties we had and getting on with the lives we want to have.
And that is the optimistic feeling I have for 2012. Not so much that “something” marvelous is going to happen, but that we are ready to make marvelous things happen. 2012 is much more of a blank slate than 2011 was: no new job, no new move, no planned vacations. With the change in schools, we are expecting to have more time, money, and energy to explore our new city. Donia should finally be able to dig in to her work, and I am anxious to see how year 2 at CompTIA goes now that I have an idea about the annual cycle. I have no doubt that the children will continue to provide some amount of angst, and I have no idea when we will claim to feel that we are fully settled in. But I also have hope that our family will continue to grow stronger in the next year and we will end up better than where we started.
